Well I guess the random Ramblings begin..

I'm writing this from Gate 1, American Airlines terminal. The first stop on this 24hr journey to Cyprus. I have so so many different feelings and emotions right now and it's insane. I'm just grateful I paid for my overweight bag, and that i'll board my flight and all will be well. I've got butterflies right now though.. it's like shit!!!!!!!!!!!!! you're going to another countryyyy!!!! faaaaaauuuuccck! lol.. but that's how I feel inside. I'm just trying to remain open minded and enjoy the experience.. Well, now i'm gonna go and uhhhh eat breakfast!

-xoxo-
-Lo.

It's so weird

It's been 5 days on this vegan diet and it has opened my eyes to sooo many things. I had no idea how much stuff comes from animals, and it's in a way disgusting how much us as humans depend on it. Although I know I'm only doing this for a month, I really think I'm gonna draw up a new eating plan for when this is over because it's insane how much I eat from animals.

Carrying On.

I've been attempting to pre-pack all my stuff for Cyprus and man is it hard. I never realized how much stuff I still need, it's like starting Frosh year all over agin :/. Anywho I'm still excited about it and I want to do my homework now.. soooo...

bye.


xoxo

That awkward moment..

When you realize you're in love! Last night was the first time in a while that I had mentally clicked with my boyfriend on like a completely deeper level. It's just so satisfying. It was kind of sad because he told me that he's going to be going to school in North Carolina in the fall, and I threw a complete fit, and I didn't realize how selfish I was being. I could totally be plagued with some boyfriend who doesn't go to school, and although he doesn't have a job, he always finds a way to treat me to nice things and I'm so thankful for that.
But it wasn't until he was holding me, and I started thinking and crying (because i'm such a damn pessimist) about all the things that could go wrong, ie; him finding a better girlfriend, us growing apart, him cheating, etc. but to my surprise he had went through all the same thoughts when I told him I was studying abroad. I didn't think about the fact that I would be standing in an airport with tears coming down my eyes, saying 'see ya later' to my family, and my boyfriend. It was overwhelming because he started opening up saying how he's thought the worse, ie; what if I get drunk and hook up with some random Cypriot (which I assure you will never happen) and even breaking up with him just because I don't want to hold him down while I'm away.
He pulled my head up and looked me directly in my eyes and wiped my tears from my face. It wasn't until then that I realized I am really in love with him. He assured me of regardless of ANYTHING that happens he isn't going anywhere, and it's just the assurance I needed. It made me feel good to know that someone loves me just as much, if not more, than I love them. It's beautiful, regardless of all the ups and downs that we've had, I'm reaallly thankful for him.

Wow, I can't believe it..

And So It Begins..

Since I wasn't surely satisfied with my French Grade this semester, I decided to take my last French requirement over the summer. I'm also taking a Geology class, and a Black World Studies course. So the journey to graduation begins!

It's exciting because in the Fall, in Nicosia, Cyprus I'll only be taking electives, an internship, and one class for my American Studies requirement.

Then in the Spring, back in Oxford, OH I'll be taking my capstone!

Sheesh it's been a long journey, and I still have so much to see! I can't wait!!!!

Today's a Big Day..

I can't think of the last time I've gotten completely wasted for no reason. SO today is the day. I haven't taken the time to reward myself and I think today, I deserve to. I've got about 3 bottles of vodka in the freezer and I'm gettin' WASTED! I'm going to reward myself for making it this far in college, being an intern for CityBeat, Freelancing for them as well, not being a teen mom, being FINISHED WITH THE JOURNALISM MAJOR REQUIREMENTS (!!!!)  And damnit for just making it this far in life.

I think this will be rather rewarding, and I hope to document every. fuckin'. moment.

Catch you tomorrow to write about my hangover!

I made it

Well, I got through Mother's Day, and my Mom's 52nd earthly birthday. Not saying I didn't bitch, or cry, or kick, or scream.. but I made it through. Up next is the 2 year mark of her death. It still seems like yesterday when she died. It's mortifying.. the dreams that I've been having, that is. It just makes me wonder, when and if I even want to be able to live without them. I couldn't imagine having amnesia, or dementia when I'm older and forgetting everything.

On another note, final grades were posted today. :/ I passed all my classes, but i got friggin B's in classes where I KNOW I deserved an A. I just hate shitty professors who think they grading too fuckin hard to give people what they deserve, for instance, this BWS class. We come in the first week and this nigga ain't have no syllabus or nothing. We had no Midterm, and No final. We had no Quizzes, just watched movies n shit during class.. so why the fuck would you be giving me a B+? Bitch, just make it an A. Moving on, I passed frickin' French with a C-. Thank got damn God. I knew I was getting at least a F in that fuckin class.. lmao. But now I have one more French course left that I'll take this summer, and I'll be done with the 5 French courses I was forced to take..


Well, I think that's it..

Until next time..

Uncertainty

I've been a complete emotional wreck lately.. I mean my Mom's birthday is Monday (May 9) plus Mother's Day is Sunday. That in itself has made my nerves and feelings a wreck. My boyfriend and I have been arguing nonstop and I'm sure it's because all I want is a bit of attention during this time and I can't even get that cuz we always fighting which keeps us apart. Then on top of it all, I'm working on getting my stuff together to go Abroad. I moved into my aunt's basement and hell I already feel unwelcome. I had to stuff all my shit from my bedroom in my apartment into this equally sized bedroom, but of course my stuff doesn't fit because someone has huge contraptions of Barbies in there, so I had to get a storage for my things, adding yet ANOTHER bill i'll have to pay while i'm there. But I guess i'm making do with what I have and i'll be grateful for a place to stay but I just know I can't be here for long.
It's day 3 of summer and I'm almost close to snapping. The constant asking of where I'm going, Hell i'm a got damn adult and I've been one since 2009 when they cranked my Mom's body underground. I just dunno what i'm expecting. I'm ready to get abroad, get back, be done with school and have a job with my own personal space so I can just relax and continue doing my own thing..

Well, i'm glad. This is my first bitchin' post  and I'm sure more to come.